It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single student under the influence of alcohol must be in want of a one night stand.
Yes- we've all done it. And even if we've not done it literally, most of us will at least have had a drunken embrace with a stranger in a dingy, sticky club. It's a funny thing, this act of sexual conquest. On the one hand you feel as if you should swagger along the next day, on the other you feel as if you should hang your head in shame and review your morals.
In light of my previous lament upon relationships, a friend and I got talking about the fact the despite our general lack of relationships, there’s always those drunken moments on a night out. I noted however that getting blind drunk and snogging some loose –pun intended- acquaintance is probably worse for us in the long run despite the temporary high it may put us on.
So why do we do it? For one, as my friend pointed out, its one of the easiest ways to meet potential partners. Of course, ending up in bed with them is probably not the best first impression but the point still stands. With a few drinks down you and dressed your best, we are probably more likely to start random conversations on a night out.
Of course, there is also the fact that we’re all in our twenties, we’re students and for some reason we think that exempts us from the usual rules of etiquette. A female friend of mine likes to live by the following motto:
If I can’t remember it, it didn’t happen
As students we live alone, we’re out of the clutches of our parents and generally we’re encouraged into oblivion by unthinkably cheap drinks. It’s okay if we’re so drunk we don’t know what we’re doing, it’s usually not a problem- everyone else is just as intoxicated as you are! Of course in my case, it’s often caught on camera- as you can see below….
Am I not just so unthinkably classy? (In my defence, this occurred as I attempted to save my friend Lucy from some weird fellow who had decided to dance literally on her. However, the floor is very, VERY slippy and I ended up rugby tackling her to the ground which, though not very classy, was an effective way of getting him to leave. Sadly, this is not the only time I fell in this club. There's a funny story that ends with me in hospital till 4am.)
Here’s the real truth of it all though: no matter how good an idea it seemed at the time, it will always come back to haunt you. My housemate Hannah has discovered this on many occasions and as for me I NEVER seem to be able to escape them
They appear everywhere. While you’re dragging myself round Sainsburys looking for cold medicine and comfort food, on a date with some one else, as an ex boyfriends housemate, out on a night out with another former datee that turns out to be their best friend.
It is never, ever, ever pretty. Never. Seriously. You will find yourself diving into a nearby clothes shop and knocking over eighty pound shoes in an attempt to escape them. You will never again be able to go out make-upless in your holey sweatpants to by unseemly amounts of chocolate. They will be there, popping round the corner of the aisle when you very least expect it for the rest of your university life.
Yes- we've all done it. And even if we've not done it literally, most of us will at least have had a drunken embrace with a stranger in a dingy, sticky club. It's a funny thing, this act of sexual conquest. On the one hand you feel as if you should swagger along the next day, on the other you feel as if you should hang your head in shame and review your morals.
In light of my previous lament upon relationships, a friend and I got talking about the fact the despite our general lack of relationships, there’s always those drunken moments on a night out. I noted however that getting blind drunk and snogging some loose –pun intended- acquaintance is probably worse for us in the long run despite the temporary high it may put us on.
So why do we do it? For one, as my friend pointed out, its one of the easiest ways to meet potential partners. Of course, ending up in bed with them is probably not the best first impression but the point still stands. With a few drinks down you and dressed your best, we are probably more likely to start random conversations on a night out.
Of course, there is also the fact that we’re all in our twenties, we’re students and for some reason we think that exempts us from the usual rules of etiquette. A female friend of mine likes to live by the following motto:
If I can’t remember it, it didn’t happen
As students we live alone, we’re out of the clutches of our parents and generally we’re encouraged into oblivion by unthinkably cheap drinks. It’s okay if we’re so drunk we don’t know what we’re doing, it’s usually not a problem- everyone else is just as intoxicated as you are! Of course in my case, it’s often caught on camera- as you can see below….
Am I not just so unthinkably classy? (In my defence, this occurred as I attempted to save my friend Lucy from some weird fellow who had decided to dance literally on her. However, the floor is very, VERY slippy and I ended up rugby tackling her to the ground which, though not very classy, was an effective way of getting him to leave. Sadly, this is not the only time I fell in this club. There's a funny story that ends with me in hospital till 4am.)Here’s the real truth of it all though: no matter how good an idea it seemed at the time, it will always come back to haunt you. My housemate Hannah has discovered this on many occasions and as for me I NEVER seem to be able to escape them
They appear everywhere. While you’re dragging myself round Sainsburys looking for cold medicine and comfort food, on a date with some one else, as an ex boyfriends housemate, out on a night out with another former datee that turns out to be their best friend.
It is never, ever, ever pretty. Never. Seriously. You will find yourself diving into a nearby clothes shop and knocking over eighty pound shoes in an attempt to escape them. You will never again be able to go out make-upless in your holey sweatpants to by unseemly amounts of chocolate. They will be there, popping round the corner of the aisle when you very least expect it for the rest of your university life.
Do not be deceived boys and girls- they are for life, not just for one night.
Am sat in the office and I showed Joanne this blog over my shoulder and she is SHOCKED and APPALLED at you! xxx
ReplyDeleteHOW DARE YOU ATTEMPT TO RUIN ME IN MY ABSCENCE!!
ReplyDelete